anon: Hey, with virago, what does ‘dominance’ or ‘being dominant’ mean?
Also I found your blog through r/GNCStraight and I’m thinking about using virago for myself alongside other terms (fakeboy, FtM, crossdresser, butch, etc) but I’m not very dominant haha (generally quite awkward and also a submissive when it comes to kink if we’re talking about power play) so I’m not sure if I want to use it for that reason. Demographically I’m an AFAB person on testosterone who’s a MSM.
viscasi:
Well, technically Anibelle ( @viragoposting) is the one who coined Virago initially, so on an official note they’re probably the best person to ask about its definition. But since you came to me, I’ll still do my best to answer! (And Anibelle, if you disagree with my take, feel free to correct me)
Iirc, the word “dominance” in the definition was intentionally left a bit vague in order to include a variety of experiences. For some viragos, their “dominance” refers to sexual dominance, for others it refers to romantic “dominance” (taking on the roles more typically expected of men), for others it might be more of like a general vibe thing, and for others it might be multiple or all of those things.
Also, as I understand it, you don’t necessarily have to be dominant to be a virago, since a virago is a woman who is one or more of these things: dominant, masculine, and attracted to feminine men. So, whether you feel like that describes you is largely up to your discretion!
And you’ll have to forgive me but I’m not familiar with the meaning of the acronym MSM, which I why I didn’t comment on that.
P.s. thanks for telling me how you found my blog! It’s helpful to know where people are coming from so I know how to maximize my blog’s exposure. Plus it’s just kinda fun to know haha.
viragoposting:
(Also a reminder: I didn’t coin the term, but in seeing some small usage of the word irl and online caused me to advocate for our shared experiences, hence the explanation being broader!
Dominance in this case was an accurate simplification of how typical relationship structures with straight couples operate and what is unexpected of women in dating.
Put very very simply: Virago are masculine aligned women attracted to feminine men, and a women with a reversed view of gender roles.)
Context:
Additional anon ask:
anon: https://www.tumblr.com/viscasi/788653277733584896/hey-with-virago-what-does-dominance-or-being
MSM here is a clinical sexual label, refers to ‘men who have sex with men,’ regardless of actual orientation. Same anon here.
viscasi replied:
Ohh gotcha. I’m relatively familiar with the concept but wasn’t aware of the acronym! Thank you for letting me know!
In terms of if that would affect whether the “virago” label applies to you, we get into kind of a grey area. My understanding is that “virago” only (or at least mainly?) applies to women, so it might not serve you. That said, I also know that gender identity can be complex— if you know that the virago label refers to “women who are masculine, dominant, and/or attracted to feminine men,” and you still feel like that applies to you in some way, then this is a case of “do whatever you want forever.”
But I could totally be wrong about it only referring to women— @viragoposting, what do you think?
viragoposting
Hey I remember you! It’s all fine, do as you like!
At the end of the day, I totally have no problem with people using the terms since they’re around the area of masculinity. I have no say on how you identify! If you’re looking for an accurate description of yourself, the shoe appears to not fit you all the way. But if that’s fine for you, have at it!